How do u make a fat person cry......... tell em mc donnalds is closed (^_^)

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Whats the difference between a cat and a dog? Nothing a cat and a dog is an extremely different species.

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Roey Jegen

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Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

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What do you do if a Polish soldier throws a hand-grenade at you? Run.

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What happened when the black guy looked up his family tree? He discovered long-forgotten relatives who had lived during difficult times for African-Americans in the United States and faced disenfranchisement, extrajudicial killings, and chattel slavery. His sense of racial consciousness and solidarity was thereby reinforced.

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Whats yellow pink and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? Oh were you expecting an answer here, if i knew the answer i wouldn't have asked a question.

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Why do blondes where pigtails? Because they look nice.

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What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

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a man walked into a bar.... when i say bar i mean a metal pole, the man suffered from concussion

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Jingle bells Batman smells WHERE IS SHE??!!?!?!?

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What is 9 + 10? 21

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Why did the cat explode on the street? Cause i put a grenade in a fridge and then threw it at it.

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BOOBALANBOO

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Why did the monKey fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first one

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What eats McDonalds for breakfast, lunch and dinner, annoys everyone around them, and could care less about anyone but themselves? The population of the United States.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the grass is always greener on the other side.

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whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

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A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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