If a tree falls on a cat in the woods, does it make a sound? Yes and no, the tree falling makes a loud noise, but the cat under it is instantly killed, preventing any sound that would of been made by the now crushed feline.

i like my women like i like my coffee without a penis

The term "shots fired" often reminds me of the time a couple of buddies had a drinking contest and I shoved a lit cigarette down the loser's throat

A Jew, homosexual and Irishman walk into a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.

Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

What is brown and sticky? A stick.

What's small, cold, and lifeless? A dead baby.

a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food before? No? Well neither have they.

What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea? It gets wet.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

There are too many 20 year olds getting pregnant. Teenage pregnancy is ruining our society!

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

Men's Sports

Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

Q: How much does it cost to have 50cent and Nickleback perform together? A: 45 cents, because its 50 cents, and you get a nickle back

A Squirrel gets ready for hybernation. 21 You Stupid

A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

I have read and agree to the terms of service.

I just missed my bus. At least I haven't got cancer.

What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

Your momma's so stupid, her IQ is below average.

What's 6 + 9? 15.

if a green person is sitting on a green couch in his green room in his green house on his green lawn in his green town, what color is the sky? blue of course. while it is possibe to paint or make all things described in the above paragraph, you cannot paint the sky green because it is actually the color of light when the suns rays reflect on the water droplets within the ozone layer, thus forming the sky. the sky is not a tangible object, so therfore the paint would not be able to properly rest and dry onto the surface.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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