Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

Your mom's so hairy, she should go to the barber!

womens rights to vote

Why did the depressed teenager die? Because he had cancer.

Why is jim retarded? Because he fucks chickens

"Doctor," I said while poking my head, "My head hurts!" I poked my knee. "My knee hurts, too!" Then I tried touching my arm. "OW! So does my arm!" I even tried poking my teeth. "OUCH! Even my teeth hurt! What will I do Doctor?" "That's easy," said the Doctor, "I'll fix your finger right away."

Why, you might ask, did in fact the chicken cross this all too infamous road? His grandma-ma phoned the righteous bird and requested a visit. Chickens never displease their family.

Knock Knock! Come in.

a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar... they sit down, have a deep and meaningful conversation about theism, and don't really drink anything.

Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

What's so good about being Swiss? Well.... The flag's a big plus

Sometimes I hope into bed and pretend I'm a carrot!!!!

whats faster than the speed of light? a jew with a coupon

Where did the little girl go after the explosion? Everywhere.

It was a warm summer day when justin beiber got hit by the bus everyone was cheering

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.

Where did the little girl go when the bomb went off? Everywhere

A bar walks into a man... Wait...

Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

Why did the baby cry? Because his parents dropped him on his head.

What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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