I farted!!!!! t'was smelly??????? I LIKE CRABS! #tomato problems

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Why did the white girl have a black friend? Because she was very welcome to different races and wanted to learn about her culture.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because it is a bar for cats only.

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Why does Ron Weasley have friends? He does't. He's a ginger.

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why did the dentist quit his job because he had saved up enough money for his retirement

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what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

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What do you call a room full of lawyers? A group of legally educated professionals.

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your mammas so poor she is probably going die in a few days of starvation

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wots brown and smells like shite shite

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How do you call a dog with no legs? You can't call it, you have to go and pick it up.

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Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

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What do Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen have in common? They are both celebrities.

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Q. Why did the fat boy cross the road? A. To go on a diet

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An enormous black man wearing a durag walks into a bar. Due to the diverse and friendly comminuty he lives in, nobody judges him on his race, ethnicity, or culture. He goes on to pursue his career in business and gets a Masters Degree in Business Administration. He get's a job as an IT Director for a very successful business and he marries a well educated woman. They have 2 kids, but one of them is diagnosed with "Ondine's Curse" and dies in it's sleep. Distressed, and mourning the death of his newborn son, he seeks help from his parents. Regardless of his parents comforting and loving attitude towards him, he goes into the inner city smoking and selling illegal drugs like crack. He even got into cocaine and marjuana. 4 and a half years later, he was about to attempt suicide, when he saw his only living son, whom he loved with all his heart, walk into the room with his teddybear. He just looked at him, and he looked back. Suddenly, the father started crying. Flashbacks started playing though his mind of his happy life he was steadily pursuing. "why me?" He constantly thought to himself. What did he do to deserve this? 7 years in the future. The father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Right before his death, he asked to talk to his son. "Son, listen to me. Never try to comtemplate the world we live in, it's too spontaneous and insane to understand. This world can either give you bliss or depression. Nothing inbetween. And most people who make there way up to the top eventually will fall. What goes up must come down. Ha... I never thought I'd be talking to me own son giving him a silly lecture in a deathbed. But just look at me..."the father gets very muddled and disoriented* "...Son. They say most of us have a good reason to live. Well don't most of us have a good reason to die too?" Malik Cartwright died on March 22, 1999. His son went on to legally change his middle name to "Leek", after his father's nickname. He went on to get the same Master's Degree that his father received, and had kids of his own. The whereabouts of the mother are unknown.

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How many black men does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, you racist.

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When is a tree not a tree? When it's a rock.

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Is your friend gay? Yeah, duh, of course he's happy.

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Why did Jimmy's sexy teacher ask him to stay behind after class? His grades have been slipping and she expects better from her students. How anyone views her sexually is of no relevance to this situation.

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What's worse than the unwarrented death of six milliion Jews? The death of six million and one Jews

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Jameson: hey peter peter parker: what Jameson: do you know what my favorite kind of beans are Peter: no Jameson: van de camps

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Bob: why didthe chicken cross the road? Tom: why? Bob: to get to your house Knock knock Tom: whos their Bob: the chicken

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If you don't get this joke, you're gay.

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What made people stop likeing Ice tea? Ice-T

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What did the bartender say to selena gomez? Your hot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops