Knock Knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito (from the Spanish or Portuguese word for little fly) is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat). Mosquitoes resemble crane flies (family Tipulidae) and chironomid flies (family Chironomidae), with which they are sometimes confused by the casual observer. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did Doctor Who visit Ancient Greece? Because has a time machine and has that ability

thumb_up thumb_down +46

what happens when a Texan see's a black guy? he says howdy

thumb_up thumb_down +46

What's worse than an anti-joke? People who don't get the concept of an anti-joke and post regular jokes on this site.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Suddenly the Titanic started sinking, its a shame it sunk before anyone managed to find out what it was sinking about.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What do you call a needle with two points? A two headed needle.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Mike tyson

thumb_up thumb_down +44

I took your mother out to a fine seafood dinner. I never called her again.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

Why did the little girl get a haircut? A; she has cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

two nuns were driving in Transylvania when a vampire jumps out in front of their car the first nun said "show it your cross" so the secong got out of the car and yelled Get out of the way you pric!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Roses are grey Violets are grey Because I'm colorblind

thumb_up thumb_down +42

I haven't made a school shooting joke yet, but the day is young Just like those kids that got shot

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has two penises

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Your mama is so fat, her gravitational field varies with distance cubed!

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did the leprechaun cross the road? If you still believe in leprechauns, you need to see a doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

thumb_up thumb_down +40

want a balloon? yeah

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Snausages.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops