Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why was the black guy mad at the white guy? Duh, cause the black guy slapped the white guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

So an Indian walks into a bar and says: ? ?? ??? ?????? ??? ??? ? ??? ??? ??????

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem makes no sense FIRETOE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

When life gives you lemons, you realise that life isn't a physical object and therefore you have problems. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already told her twice.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What did the alcoholic get for his Birthday?\ A: A Jail Sentence

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Ask me if I'm a tree... Are you a tree? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

whats white, blue, and red all over? a white guy in the ghetto

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A guy walks into a bar, and then is hit with the full force of all the things he never did in life, of how he wasted his younger years chasing a bigger paycheck rather than trying to live life, and all the love he wasted on people who didn't care about him. He begins to cry as his first drink arrives, and orders many more as the night passes. He loses his keys as he leaves and stumbles home in a drunken stupor, contemplating suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what does michael jackson do to little boys? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Back when I was your age, we had to entertain ourselves with video games and TV.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had a seizure.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why didn't peyton manning's grand mom call him after his game? She died of throat cancer 5 years ago

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

american government

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock Knock. Who's there? The IRS. You didn't pay your taxes so we have to take you to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Knock knock, Who's there? Jason. Jason wh-(death sound when being cut by chainsaw)

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the quarter say to the dime? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops