A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

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Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

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fruit salad?

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What's green and has four wheel? A tractor.

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Its true, he didnt write that!!

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen

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Kelly Clarkson

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

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Why do you go to a black mans yardsale? To buy something cheap. Why don't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because it is illegal.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

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A man was driving five penguins across the Croatian-Serbian border. He was a penguin smuggler.

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Whats hotter than a sunny day. A pot of boiling water.

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Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

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What did the Muslim have under his hood of his car? A V-8 engine.

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Woman rights.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

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What requires lots of rubbing, dirty pictures, and leaves you happy for a little bit, but then you realize you're sad and lonely? A minimum wage job where you clean pictures.

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Have you heard the one about the Norwegian? He killed 98 people.

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Why couldn't the unicorn fly? It was a horse.

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Why is cheese yellow? Answer: I don't know, I was hoping that you would know.

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If your South American in the kitchen, what are you in the bathroom? European ( your a pee an)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops