Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

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Why did samantha die? Because she had cancer.

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No, I do not have the will, I have a family now, I make a living writing fiction, and well, play a small role in keeping not national, but worldwide stability in such things as the economics. The thing is, that you are renegades, you do not break the law, but you like to do things your own way, that gets you enemies among the so called "paragons" in the face of society and media. Its just like back in the days, if CIA, The Feds, Interpol and such are known as the "Paragons of civilization" or "the good guys" if you prefer, they can point towards you guys, and say "these are evil", and then nothing can stop them.

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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The Mexican word of the day is JUICY. Tell me if juicy see the cops.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would? Probably a lot of wood.

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My bologna has a first name It's O-S-C-A-R... My bologna has a second name It's M-A-Y-E-R... Oscar and Mayer were the names of the pig and the cow that were slaughtered and subsequently processed into the bologna I am eating.

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Your mother is SO wealthy, that she should help stop the poor children in Africa from starving by donating some spare change to the Let's-Help-Stop-The-Poor-Little-African-Children-From-Starving donation center. -not a real place!!!!!

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How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

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How many Jews does it take to fix a gas leak?...

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Why did the bones cross the road? They didn't, the dogs ate them.

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What do you call a guy who answers your door Whatever his name his

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Why do Italian people like pasta? Because it tastes good.

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Why is it as hot as the sun? Because it is the sun

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A man walked into a Persian dentist office. After a few hours he leaves the office with his mouth feeling much better because the oral-surgery went exeptionally well.

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Yo momma so lazy she hasn't been to work in weeks and you no longer have electricity or food.

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A Squirrel gets ready for hybernation. 21 You Stupid

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbuluDBHpfQ

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Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

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What do you get when you mix black, white, and Asian? A panda bear

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what do you call a mentally and physically obese man? nothing until you know or obtain his name

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Woman's rights.

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How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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