We have a 24hr fitness center...it is open from 6 to 11

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If Daniel has 3 concaved man boobs, and Isabelle has 13 homosexual friends, what is the ratio of dolphins to African rapists? Wenis, because Jimmy was raped last night.

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yo mama's so fat!!!

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms Why did Susie drop her ice cream cone? She got hit by a bus Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere Knock Knock "Whos There?" Not Susie

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Knock Knock Who's there? ... No one, you have Schizophrenia

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It just didn't.

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Q) Why was six afraid of seven? A) Seven was black.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Very carefully.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "Yes, with proper medical attention and rest, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the hospital? A: The victim of a violent mob attack

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Roses are black, violets are black, we are all black Shit i'm colour blind

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Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

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?ti saw won troffe eht htrow t'nsaw yllaer siht

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Why did the plane crash? -Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the dead Catholic say to Atheist? Nothing. Dead guys can't talk!

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how do you get someone out of a chair? hit him with a shovel

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Why didn't the boy have any toes? - Because he did not have any legs.

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Lethal injection is a lot more humane than the electric chair. I know because nobody's complained about it yet.

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An Englishmen, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, and ordered a beer. They later went home and slept. They woke up the next morning with a slight hangover.

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What is quite heavy and if it falls off a tree and hits you in your head you die? A sheets packet

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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Who makes the sandwiches in a lesbian relationship?

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You might be a Redneck...if your job requires you to work long hours out in the sun and you do not take advantage of sunscreen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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