Why did the man not open his door to the trick or treaters? He was a sex offender and it was illegal for him to open it...

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Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

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Why did Eduardo cross the road. The same reason he crossed the border.

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock off a building

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roses are red violets are black i hope your chest is not as flat as your back.

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ask me if im a tree! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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(insert command here) Oh yeah, well I want world peace.

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one swipe, i call this one the cinderella story if you HAH! know what i mean, Paul....are you ok?....nooo...., you know the lettuce in antarctica is pretty questionable

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Why was the white man poor? Because he could not hold a stable job for his wife and kids.

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knock knock who's there? no one, but I appreciate the fact you asked.

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What's green and has four wheel? A tractor.

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Whats worse than The Holocaust? TEN HOLOCAUSTS!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

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What did the big chimney say to the smaller chimney? Nothing chimneys don't talk

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You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

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What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A Pilot

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Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy Get in the van

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What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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What did the bear say to the mouse? Roar.

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A germaphobe is in a room full of sick people. He leaves.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops