What do you call a guy who died in a stampede? Grandpa.

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Hellooooo whos there? Its me fred Fred? A Canadian

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What's long, hard, and wet? A difficult college exam that fell in a puddle of water

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If you looked up stupid in Webster's dictionary, you wouldn't see a picture of yourself, because Webster's dictionary doesn't have pictures.

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Two men walk into a bar... ..I didn't say what type of bar...

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What's black and fun to hang from trees? Tire swings.

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a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

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^that joke a piece of shit

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Yo mama so fat... Her doctor told her she's morbidly obese and she has 2 years to live if she doesn't change her eating habits and exercise regularily.

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What did one homo say to the other? Well, the politically correct term is homosexual, and he didn't say anything because they've never met.

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What happens when you click a link on a web page offering sex? You get a virus.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Little Tommie is dead In a body bag Going to the dumpster Behind my house

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS

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John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead John then proceeds to violently masturbate. Sam at first feels uncomfortable, then shits all over John and joins in.

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Why was the asian boy made fun of in the locker room? Because of the nipple piercing he had.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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what's the difference between a white man and a black man? their skin color

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A man walks into a bar, but it's really not his fault because his seeing eye dog led him right into it.

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what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

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What's the difference between gays and straights? Sexual orientation

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Why did the woman cry? She was sodomized by wild animals

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a man walks into a bar....... thats it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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