Why did the baby fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms.

There's three sisters: a blonde, a brunette and a redhead. They know she's not they're real mom.

Good to know tattletale, I remember hating you back then when you betrayed me, but I cant wait to meet you again. Anyway Nero, I am a girl, its not about sex with me, I just had to tell you, and hope you will take better care of yourself, I know you used to be worried about your looks, and I just want you to understand ill be there for you no matter what. Thanks for the kind words Nero, I know you mean them, you never hid the fact that you found me attractive, but while I did not understand then why you would ruin every nice moment by saying something cheesy or rude, I think I get it now... I know you need rest, but can I arrive as soon as possible? Ill just wait outside or something, I wont be a bother I promise.

What did the black kid get for his birthday?

What do nappies and politicians have in common? Not a lot, although President Roosevelt suffered from incontinence due to polio as a child.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He threw it, because he had parkinson's!

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

Why did bobby fall of the swing? He had no arms -Knock knock -Who's there? -Bobby -But how? -I knocked with my diick -Oh

How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

jack shine and keiran = nate robinson

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Drive an ax through its head.

Why did the blond put a condom on her hear? So, she would not get hearing ads.

What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

How do you teach your daughter to stop wetting the bed? Cut her best friends eye-lids off at her birthday party.

Knock knock Who's there? No one Cool

What do you get when you cross a Kangaroo with a sheep? A: That would be impossible for it is impossible to breed a kangaroo and a sheep due to their difference in genetic material and number of chromosomes

The 17 year old buy called his computers support number to remove a virus from his old computer, so he can gift the computer to his little cousin for his birthday. But before giving the computer to his cousin he downloaded over 120 hours of adult film onto it.

Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

Did you hear about the couple that met in a revolving door? They died.

Why do black people like Basketball so much? Because it is a sport participated world wide. They just happen to like it too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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