Q: what weighs 6 ounces sits in a tree and is very deadly? A: a sparrow with a machine gun

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roses are red violets are blue i have a penis get in the bed

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What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln lie? Because he is dead.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem makes no sense FIRETOE!!!

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Knock Knock Who's There? The Police The Police Who? Uhm, Ma'am your son just died in a car wreck

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neil patrick harris

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Bin Laden: dang, these pizza guys are so late, this pizza better be free! door: Ring ring ring.. Bin Laden: yes its finally here!

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What does a Chinese girl get for Christmas? New parents...

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A Black Man walks into a bar...

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out it's an orange

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What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

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Who was the first person Steven Hawking runs up to when he finds out something new about science? He is in a wheelchair due to a condition called ASL, therefore he cannot "run"

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What is black at the bottom, and white at the top? Society.

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Knock,knock whose there? The pizza delivery guy the pizza delivery guy who the pizza delivery guy who didnt give you your pizza

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why do you care?

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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What does rainbow stand for? Rick Astley Is Nesting By Our Window to harass us

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So the docter saw the girl had a "M" on her chest during surgery. He asked her if he had a boyfreind from Michigan. She said "no, but i have a girlfreind from winsconsin, why do u ask?"rf

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A black woman sits down in the front of a bus.

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How do you silence a barking dog? You rip out its vocal cords.

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What's white and sticky? A glue stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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