A man buys a kitten from the store. He gets home, takes it out of its cage, and realizes that it wasn't the kitten he wanted. He then returns to the store and exchanges for the kitten he originally wanted, but then decides to keep both because he is feeling particularly hungry.

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Why wasn't the clown funny? He didn't have a face

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground beef

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How much does a polar bear way? Near 1,100 pounds.

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What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

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What do you call a gay woman who likes to smoke cigarettes? A lesbian with a possible nicotine addiction.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did a second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did a third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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A little boy starts to be followed by a man in a large white van. They come across an intersection, the boy turns left, and the man turns right.

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What is black and blue and red all over? Rihanna

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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What did Liberia say to Texas? Tag, you're it!

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Wanna hear a joke? A Republican political activist.

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What happened to all of the happy birds flying over the field? They were all suddenly stricken by the bird flu and died.

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Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? he was epileptic

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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What do you call a black man that robs a bank? A bank robber

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What do Ethiopian children do at night? Starve

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A man who can't spell walks into an Arab.

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How do you survive the plague? you dont.

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A kid walks into a bar. The bartender promptly calls child protective services and the child is placed in a caring foster home.

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Knock Knock ... guess nobody's home.

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GAME OVER!!!!!! OF COURSE!!!!!! I BEHELD AS SATAN FELL FROM THE SKY..: LIKE LIGHTNIIIIIIIIIIIING! Street Fighter 2: The (antijoke) Movie. Moral: Raul Julia, you are the man, rest in peace dude you made that movie a masterpiece, do not give this a thumbs up for me, but for the most brilliant performance he ever gave.

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How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

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Q: What did the man say before he was stabbed? A: "What are you gonna do, stab me?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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