Q. what is catness and pita name together pines

knock knock. who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

Want to hear a good joke? The NBA.

I saw a poor man named rich

Two robots walk into a bar, just kidding, they have Polio.

sticks and stones may break my bones but hemophilia will make me bleed to death

Why is god mean? Cause he doesn't like you.

Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

The Mexican word of the day is JUICY. Tell me if juicy see the cops.

In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

whats one word that gets everyones attention? rapist,bomb,and sex

How do you kill a Mexican? Rupture its vital organs like any other organism ,but murder is wrong and should not be done under any circumstance

What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

How do you avoid dying? You can't everything dies.

If u wanna get high, smoke weed

What did the one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers!!

What did the dog say to the mouse? Cat

What do dead people think when they die? Nothing,they're dead.

Where did Susie go after the bombing? Everywhere

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

What's the difference between a wife and a chef? A chef has the choice to leave the kitchen.

A boy found a nickel on the street. So he went to the ice cream shop and bought a gumball with the nickel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...