mark is mark

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Your mother is so unintelligent that her IQ score is equal to or lower than 2 standard deviations below the national average of 100 on the Mensa approved intelligence test that has been properly administered and supervised.

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so dont touch it.

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Four rats are smoking in an alley. One rat turns to another and comments, "These are some fine smokes. Where'd ya score these?" The rat holding the pack of Menthols replies, "Off a' Fred." He points to a rotting whale carcass in the road. The other rats are horrified. "How did a whale die in the street?!," they squeak. "He didn't. He died on the beach."

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ask me if im a house are you a house? no

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What did the banana say to the other banana? We're both marshmallows

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Q:theres a man on a tight rope 3000 feet above ground and theres a man getting head from a 90 year old women with no teath. what did they both say? A: dont look down.

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POO IS LARGE WHEN IT COMES OUT OF ME

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Why did little Lucy climb up a tree? Cos her dad beats her.

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Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

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so a mom is like so what you want hunny and the dad goes like you baby bahahahahaa get it?

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Now this is a story all about how, my life got flipped, turned upside down. Now I'd like to take a minute, just sit right there, and I'll tell you how I lost my job at the tire plant, and how, being out of work and unable to find a new job, I was unable to pay my mortgage. The bank repossessed my house, my wife left me and took custody of the kids, and I ended up having to sell all my remaining possessions and move to a new city in order to try and find employment.

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A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

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What do you call a dancing panda bear? I'm not sure, but panda bears are pretty big, so the possibility of them dancing is highly unlikely.

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If you don't see banners here, it doesnt mean their not there...

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Polity ask him to stop.

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What's worse than your dad being hit by a car? Your family being hit by a bus.

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What do you call a black man eating fried chicken? By his name, which could be John, considering the popularity of said name.

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fjdkhg

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my nAME IS ALAN AND IM NOT COOL

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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What is 9 + 10? 21

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Why is it impossible to travel faster than the speed of light? Because it travels pretty darn fast.

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What do you call a fat man that can turn slim REALLY fast? Drew Carey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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