Terrorist walked into the bar, all dead, except for a small child. The police came and asked the boy: "Boy, how I survived the blast?" The boy answered: "I'm not a boy, I am broccoli"

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How many dogs does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dogs do not have aposable thumbs therefore they cannot screw in light bulbs

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I saw a butterfly yesterday with no wings so I poured some red bull on it and BAM! it drowned.

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Al Kida and Terry Wrist walk out of jail.

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What did the white man say to the muslim? Hi

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Why didn't the family go through the door? Because it was a window.

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

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Mike tyson

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What is the square root of 69? 8.30662386

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Why is a blonde a door knob... Because everybody gets a turn

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A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

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(Knock Knock) Who's there? You were late paying your mortgage and now your house is being repossessed by the bank.

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Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

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Why do guys like Halloween? Martin Luther posted the 95 theses in 1517 on this day.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm Blind.

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? Escape.

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What happens when you shoot a priest in the heart? He dies.

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What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

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What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

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What is the difference between a black guy and a road? One you put tar on and the other one is a road

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Person 1: Eric is in the hospital! I think it was those depression pills. Person 2: What did he overdose? Person 3: No he just took to much.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A mormon *slam*

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What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops