what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

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5

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What is black, white and red all over? A black, white and red pen.

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If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

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What was the tallest mountain before Mount Everest was discovered? Mount Everest

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Three Jews walk into a bar. One says something to the other two, but it was in Yiddish, and I don't speak that, so I don't know what he said, but all of them laughed really hard, so it must have been funny.

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a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

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Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights

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Whats the XBOX JUAN's most popular game. Call of Juarez!!!

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

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Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

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What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

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What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

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your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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A doctor, a farmer, and a blonde walk into a bar. The doctor orders red wine because he knows it's good for the heart. The farmer orders a Piña Colada because he likes fruit. The two men wait eagerly to what the blonde is about to order. The blonde opens her purse and says "Damn it, I can't find my credit card." Suddenly, a handsome young gentleman walks up to her says "Don't worry miss, I'll buy a drink for you. What are you having?" The blonde looks up and says "Don't worry? I just lost my credit card!" In a fit a of anger, the blonde storms out the bar and doesn't order anything.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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when does lady gaga wake up? when she dreams about a bad romance

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two penguins are sitting in a bath tub. one penguin says, "hey, can you hand me the soap?" the other penguin says, "what do i look like, a typewriter?"

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What's brown and smells like poop? A monkey.

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why did helen cellars dog runway. you would to if ur name was ujujujujjujujujujujj

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

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Jews

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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