A man walks up to an attractive woman and asks "Is it hot in here, or is it just you?" The woman replies "No, it's hot in here. It is a record breaking 114 degrees outside, which means everybody is using their air conditioner. Due to the large amount of energy air condioners require, the power has gone out in this building and the air conditioner is not functional. The tempurature in the building is 103 degrees and three children are in the emergency room because of heat stroke."

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A fat man fell on him

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why did billy drop his ice cream? he got hit by a plane that a loaf of bread was driving

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Bailey you suck at writing anti jokes quit!!!!!!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :(

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Pen15

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why did Mary fall off the swing? cuz she had no arms ------------------- knock,knock who's there? not Mary

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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who is awesome? no one...

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there is a woman named shannen. she is happily married and has children.

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While walking along the beach, a man stubs his toe on a half buried lamp. He picks it up, dusts it off, and a enormous Genie appears in front of him. "You have released me from my 10,000 year imprisonment. I will grant you 3 wishes to repay you." says the Genie. The man quickly uses his 1st wish for wealth and the 2nd for the love of a beautiful woman. Unable to think of a 3rd wish and seeing the sunken look on the Genie's face, he wished for the Genie's freedom. The Genie uses his unrestrained powers to kill the man, resurrect Hitler and enslave the human race.

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Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

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what do you call a black person in the dark? ........invisible

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how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

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Your mom is intimately familiar with many mens' penis due to her many years as a successful urologist.

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Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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A dog walks into the local newspaper to place an ad. The dog writes; "woof woof, woof woof woof." Receptionist: You know you can ad another two woofs for the same price? Dog: Well that wouldn't make any sense at all?

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If your canoe is stuck in a tree, in the middle of august, with no headlights, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A: None, snakes dont have armpits :D

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What did the salad say to the dressing? Nothing! Carrots don't talk!

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Knock Knock Who's there? ImBrewn

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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What's worse than being a jew in the holocaust Being born black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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