Why did the chick cross the road? He didn't. He was attending his father's funeral, who had been killed earlier that week by an oncoming car as he was crossing the road.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Obama is a good president, I beg to differ.

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You know what is not cool? Fire.

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What is the greatest anti-joke ever told? I had it right here, but I lost it when I was being raped by a Triceratops.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

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Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball. Super Monkey Ball who? No wonder it's super.

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Why did the nerd cross the road?? BAZINGA!!!! xD

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What's worse? Cleaning a New York bathroom, or getting stabbed. WELL I DON'T GIVE A GOD DAMN!!! They both suck!

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Woman's Rights

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Kumquats Daffodils Alka-Seltzer Serendipity Dewey Decimal System Buccaneer Avuncular Pantaloons Weasels Alligator Chewbacca Sasquatch

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A dolphin walks into a bar. Dolphins do not have legs therefore this is physically impossible.

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Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he clearly has an owner that doesn't fence him in.

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Why was the man sitting down? He was recently paralyzed in a car accident.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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Why was the boy crying last night? - a clown raped him

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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A man walks into a bar and is promptly escorted out because it is a bar for cats only.

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amy mcguire is soo amazing! i love her

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I like to rape cats.

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How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? You sneak behind it and hit a shovel across its head.

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What's Tammie short for? Diabetes claimed both her legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops