Yo momma eats healthy, exercises regularly and is likely in decent physical condition.

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Yo mamas so fat

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What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

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Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

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Why was the boy sad? He had just been in a terrible car accident in which he witnessed his entire family die painful, violent deaths and thus suffered from survivor's guilt. Also he dropped his ice cream.

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What is white and stands in the corner? A refridgerator who has been very bad...

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*insert joke here*

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A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapiens, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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How do you get 2000 people to go to heaven? Blow up a school.

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Ring. Ring. Hello? Hey, It's Sean Oh hi! How are you?

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What happened after September 11, 2001? September 12, 2001

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because Osama Bin Laden is dead.

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How do you keep a blond in suspense?

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Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

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While I was walking home from school one day, James Brown jumped out of a bush and punched me in the face. Then, when I got home, there was a walrus sitting on my couch. He then turned to look at me and said, "Penis". I then immediately farted out blades of grass.

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What's worse than a midlife crisis? Having an affair with the dog.

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Q:Why did the little girl fall out of the swing? A:Because she had no arms.

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No particular reason. It probably wasn't even aware the the ground it was crossing is what's termed as a road.

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what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

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yo mama so fat, her favorite food is seconds.

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Why did the man stop chewing gum? I threw a grenade at him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops