Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

Wow, that makes your name a lot more comfortable to say... Not type, and you seem to be more sensitive than non-red hair girls. Besides its really nice, why do you dye it? Is it like red or ginger?

a blonde, brunette and a red head are all goin to jump off a bridge and turn into something. the brunette jumps and says fish, and she turns into a fish. the red head says eagle and becomes an eagle. the blonde gets a running start, but then trips on the way off and she says shit and turns into a piece of shit.

Q) 1+1=? A) 6.

Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

Whats black, blue, and doesn't like sex? The little boy in my trunk.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face", the horse said nothing; because it is a horse.

Roses are red Violets are blue your mum is fat and so are you

How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

What do you get when you have sex with a $10 prostitute? Nothing, she's clean. She may be low-scale, but she'll be damned if she's not careful.

What do you do when you see Godzilla? You offer him ice cream.

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping a girl? You call the proper authorities. Don't try to be a hero.

YOLO.

A Black Guy, A Mexican, A White guy, an Indian guy, Santa Clause and The Easter Bunny Jump off a 500 foot cliff. Which one dies? The all do. But Santa dies first because of his weight and mass.

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Why did the guy not pet the dog? He was allergic.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

what did the man do when he went to save the other man from drowning? drowned with him...

What is the best place to get watermelons and fried chicken? A Watermelon grove and a popeyes and/or KFC

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family!

A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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