Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

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A terrorist walks into a bomb shop. He soon realizes he's in the wrong shop, leaves and goes on with his day.

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What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

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Want to hear a joke? Jokes are not allowed on this site. Only anti-jokes.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 is your mom

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What is an Anti-Joke? This is.

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A Muslim walked out of a bomb shop.

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What did the cheerleader get on Holloween? Raped.

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Why was the little boy so bad at the piano? It was his first time playing it.

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knock! knock! whos there? doctor doctor who? no Doctor Brown, you have cancer

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Why couldn't little Sally talk? Someone stapled her tongue to wall.

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

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what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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Why can't Helen Keller hear? She's dead

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Q: "What's brown and rhymes with Snoop?" A: Dr. Dre

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guess what? chicken butt.

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Roses are red, Violets are black, Why is your chest, as flat as your back

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What rhymes with popscicle and weighs at least 300 pounds? Your mom. I lied about the popsicle.

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I was at the ocean, and I saw a screaming fish. Then it died.

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How do you punish an electrician? Kill his family.

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A black man trips and falls down. You help him up and ask him if he needs any help. After a brief friendly talk you both continue on your separate ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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