Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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What is an Anti-Joke? This is.

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What is black, has either black or yellow stripes, and cannot climb trees? A parking lot.

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When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

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Snausages.

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life changes and moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medical prescription as directed by her doctor.

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Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

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Why did the first squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure. Why did Bobby fall off his bike? He was hit by 4 squirrels Why did bobby die? He was hit by a bus

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what happens when a Texan see's a black guy? he says howdy

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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What did one prisoner on death row say to the other? Can you please clean off the seat when you're done? I'd like to die in my own urine.

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What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A fossil.

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There once was a man from Peru, Who fell into an extremely deep sleep and woke up just before he choked to death on his shoe rubber.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has been sexually abusing 6 for all his life

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

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Pete and Repete are sitting on a fence. Pete falls off. Pete suffers from a scraped knee and a bruised tailbone.

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a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

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What's there like a good neighbor? Your neighbor

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what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

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Whats small, red and white, and would kill you if shot out of a cannon? A decapitated baby

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch."

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What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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