I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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Pen15

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One day my dog ran away. We drove around for a long time looking for it.

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Yo mama's so poor that she's living in poverty.

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How many Freudians does it take to screw your mother - I mean, a lightbulb?

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. Q: The one stopped. Why? A: His brother fell off, cracked his head, started uncontrollably bleeding and died.

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A black man walks into a bar and a white man says "we don't allow coloured men in here". the black man sighs and walks out, wondering what he ever did wrong, and makes his way to the liqour store, to buy some beer to drown his sorrows over his mothers death. On the way, a racist white man shoots and kills him. Then, at his funeral, someone makes the joke "Wow, how ironic. The black guy was the victim.."

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. so why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What is scary? Obama might get reelected.

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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why did the chicken cross the road to get to your house knock knock whos there the chicken

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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My tractor broke down.

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What's black and chrispy inside? A black guy with bonecancer

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i did your mom......a favor. by making you......... a sandwhich. i rubbed her pussy.........cat. she saw my dick.........tionary. I slapped her ass...........what i did.

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Whats the difference between a ferrari and a boner? Too much to list.

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Why was Michael Jackson seen shopping at Kmart? Because he heard little boys pants were 50% off the original price.

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What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

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Your mother is so fat that when she went to the doctor he recommend she lose weight or risk high blood pressure and heart attack

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir......my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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