Q: What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A: A pool table

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What's worse than a spider bite? Two spider bites. What's worse than two spider bites? The fact that 1/3 of people get cancer. What's worse than that? Three spider bites.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!!!!!!¡¡¡¡

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Why did jimmy fall of his bike? Because jimmy was a goldfish

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Why do innocent boys have wet dreams? Cause Jesus sucks.

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Q) Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest A) Real Joke : Because the parrots-eat-em-all

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What time is it Mr.Wolf? About half 5. Alright, thanks mate. How's the kids? Managing. Yeah. Yeah. Crazy world. Anyway, Got to be going. Yeah yeah. Say hi to the wife for me. Will do. Alright, Bye. See you later.

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I like my coffee the same way I like my woman with big tits I lied about the woman

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -To. - To Who? -To whom.

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What will you never see? A white guy that camp jump.

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Why didn't the girl make the basketball team? She has no arms or legs.

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what is worse then going to school farlingaye

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That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

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mom:why oh why are you such an idiotic nuisance? bobby:THATS HOW YOU WANTED ME BORN!!REMEMBER?you asked the doctor to put something in me to make me so stupid i wouldnt remember WHO gave birth to me!!

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No, luke. I am your father. damnit

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

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all muslims get the fuck out of britain you fucks

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Why was the accountant sad? He just watched his wife have consensual sex with another man.

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What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

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Why are old people such terrible drivers? As we age, our eyesight slowly deteriorates and our reflexes become slower. So, in order to be cautious, the elderly avoid high speed chases and such to maintain their and others safety. Or they could have alzheimers and not realize they are in a moving vehicle at all, it's really a tossup

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What did the cat say to the elephant? Meow.

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What's worse then finding a repeated joke on antijokes? Finding a real joke.

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So two clowns walk into a bar... . . . . . . . . . . They died

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What's black and white and red all over it? Not a newspaper because red is not all over it. Answers to this question may vary.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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