What did the man with cancer do? Die

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why weren't there any black people at the book sale? Black people don't read.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I think I lost my number so can I... No you can't because phone numbers can't be lost

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Cows make a world go round and round They also live in the town town town They make a funny sound sound sound MOO MOO MOO MOO MOO Where do cows go on saturdays? The MOOvies I am Cow Hear me MOO I weigh 10 times more than you! Why are cows black and white? Cause they dont want to be racist

thumb_up thumb_down -8

If you stretch all your skin out in a line, you will die of blood loss or possible infection

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

thumb_up thumb_down -8

do you wanna hear a joke cutsforbieber#

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two men and a woman jump out of a plane. They forgot their parachutes and all died.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

fjdkhg

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how do you fit 20 babies into a bucket? you put them into a blender. how do you get them out? chips.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats worse than the holocaust? 2 holocausts

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A dog walks into a bar and succumbs to heartworm.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

You know what's better than a taco? A better taco.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between jam and jelly? Jelly is a clear or translucent fruit spread made from sweetened fruit juice, and set using naturally occurring pectin. Jam contains both fruit juice and pieces of fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you call a dead black man? dead

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

As little Timmy crossed the finish line his heart raced with excitement he had just won the big race. Later he and his family went home to celebrate they had pizza and chips and soft drinks. Then they played scrabble and watched spiderman 2. After that Timmy went to sleep. When his parents found him that morning they mourned and mourned because their hero little Timmy was still asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did Joan of Arc have for her last meal? Steak

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"We have such clean water we drink and do a lot of other stuff with it" The American said. "What other stuff do you do with your clean water" The African Child said. "Well we take showers in and we go to bathroom with it" The American said. "So let me get this straight you even take a Shit in it to" The African Child said.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops