Why did the chicken cross the road? Just kidding, it got hit by a car on the way to the other side.

What do you do when you fall of the horse? Consider calling the paramedics because it's possible that when you hit the ground your brain sustained damage and you should be rushed to a hospital immediately.

knock, knock. come in.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to a bin lorry

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

pineapples

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

You're so fat. Well maybe to kids born in Africa.

What's sad about an old black woman being hit by a Porsche? She was my third grade English teacher, and had a huge impact upon my life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

What's a skateboard without wheels A snowboard

Knock Knock *no answer* Knock Knock *Genevieve enters the house with curiosity and is later charged with Breaking and Entering*

How does Stevie Wonder pick up girls? He doesnt, he has someone do it for him

What did the Dinosaur say to the Seal? Dinosaur's cant.. wait...

What do you call a group of angry unemployed black guys? The NBA

The Sarah Palin bus tour to teach children about history.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, and mute child get for his birthday? Nothing, his parents hate him.

Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

Anti-joke.

theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

Vagina ass.

2 women were sitting quietly

Meow.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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