What did the man with cancer do? Die

Roses are red, violets are blue. Cassidy's a whore so open the door.

Why did LeBron James up and bail on Cleveland? He thought there was a greater opportunity for postseason success by playing in Miami.

dick in your mouth just kidding haaaaaa

Do you know why children in Africa don't read Harry Potter too much? Because they can't read.

what did the blind kid want for christmas? world peace.

They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

what do you call a blonde that spends fifteen thousand dollars at a bar? an alchoholic.

Mrs. Welsh

Why did little Lucy climb up a tree? Cos her dad beats her.

What Makes Me Smile? Face Muscles.

Kesley Ioannou not shopping.

What do you call a black man yelling into a crowd? a preacher

What is white and is sometimes drunk? Milk.

An Irishman, a homosexual and a Jew walk into a bar. Paddy's really exploring his options lately.

What's the difference between vanilla ice cream and vanilla ice cream with chocolate chips? Neither one has vanilla ice cream in it except for both of them.

A panda bear walks into a bar. The bartender then alerts the zoo of the whereabouts of their missing panda.

What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

There once was a man from Kentucky...then he raped everyone in sight... THE END

Ask me if I'm a tree... Are you a tree? No.

What is worse then North Korea trying to blow up everybody? Peter Griffin twerking.

I went river dancing once. I fell in

What do you call someone too young to drink? A minor

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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