Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

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What did the man say when he was hit with a flying watermelon? Ouch.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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Ching Chong Chinaman is sitting on a wall. People make fun of his name because it is so unusual.

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I just met you! And this is crazy! I just took bath salts, and yor face looks tasty!

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my namew is jd

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

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How many gay men does it take to change a lightbulb? Usually, it takes one gay male to complete this action.

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Why did the gorilla fall on the ground Because it was dead

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What did the gun say to the pencil? Draw

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A viking walks into a bar, and orders 6 beers. the man working asks "why did you order so many beers?" the viking says"because one for me 6 brothers who were separated from me many years ago." then he leaves. the next morning the viking walks into the bar, and orders 5 beers.the man working says"im sorry for your loss." the viking says"what? oo no im just getting tierd of drinking!'

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Why did the blond put a condom on her hear? So, she would not get hearing ads.

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whats worse than finding the holocaust on your forehead? a mono brow

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Why dont you ever see black people at night? Because the majority of people sleep during the night, including the african americans

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why did the monkey fall out the tree? he lost his grip

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought the second one would have ducked.

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Wombat monkey juice.

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a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

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i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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