whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

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ROSS G IS OBESE

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A man walks into a bar. Another man walks into a bar.

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How did the cat die of indigestion? Indigestion

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What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

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What did the white man say to the black man? Nothing. Earlier that day his vocal chords were ripped out by an angry chimpanzee. He will never speak again

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Why did the chicken sneeze? Because someone put pepper on its nose.

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Knock knock Who's there? Joke Joke who? Auntie Joke Great, could you bake me those cookies I like.

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Q: I have 2 dogs. Why? A: I like dogs

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An Octopus walks into a bar and sees that there are multiple people with instruments. The man with the Guitar says "I bet you cant play the Guitar better than Led Zeplin?" So the Octopus plays and he is better than Led Zeplin. Then the man with the Piano says "I bet you can't play the piano better than Elton John?" So the Octopus Plays it better than Elton John. The Last man from Scotland says " i bet you can't plat the bagpipes better than me?" So... The Octopus is playing around with the Bagpipes and they say to him "Hurry Up!" and the Octopus says "Shut up, I'm trying to have sex with it but first I need to get it's pajamas off" (Bagpipes have 8 long things you blow into and they have a pattern that looks like a pajama pattern) hahaha

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If you're happy and you know it - put your hands in the air i have a gun.

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Noobz -wondering why your valid anti-joke is getting voted down? Simply because it's a repeat, someone else has already submitted it. Only the original is valid for positive to votes. The regulars on here willallvote a repeat down immediately. I have 3 accounts set upwith different IP's just to do that. You have been warned. Search first mo fo's

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Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

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have you ever tasted ethiopian food? ..... neither have they

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding A Duck in your apple! What is worse than finding a duck in your apple? Finding a racist in your apple! Whats worse than finding a racist in your apple? DEATH

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( o Y o )

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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Where do astronaut cows go? Nowhere. There's no such thing as an astronaut cow.

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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skurfboards we love fat kids

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Whats a black persons favorite flavored cake? fried chicken.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

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yo mommas so ugly that everyone died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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