Whats big, hard, and in my pants? A tumor.

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? .......................................................................................................................................... SEVEN EIGHT NINE!!!!!

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

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I was walking through the woods the other day when I heard a rustle in the bushes... So I went over and said, "Russell, What are you doing in the bushes?"

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miley cyrus

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what do u call a girl with cancer? bald.

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What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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Why can't you tell Knock-Knock jokes in a Japanese farmhouse? Because your fist will go through the rice paper.

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What is red and does not cry? Half a baby.

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what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homo-sexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

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What do you cal it when a black person gets married to a white person inner racial marriage

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What's the difference between a red Ferrari and a pile of deal babies? The red Ferrari is not in my garage right now.

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What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

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69

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? Ask the starving African.

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I get no respect at all. That's because I am a liar and a thief with no redeeming qualities.

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what did the homeless guy get for christmas nothing!

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Yo' momma is like a hardware store, 25 cents for a screw!

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violets are blue, my name is Dave. this poem makes no sense. microwave.

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What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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