why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuable prizes

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Why are you fat? You like devil dogs

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What did Hellen Keller call her dog? Kamikaze-go, because he was an Akita from Japan and that was his name.

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asian, do math

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How did Pikachu jump off of a 100 story building and survive? He's not real

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That is so sweet of you, for a moment I thought I had said something that might have insulted you, but then again, considering the length of the message I see why it took so long.

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Why couldn't Ray Charles read? He was blind.

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Why did the baby start crying? Its mom slapped it in the face, causing permanent brain damage that would haunt it throughout its life.

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What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

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what's worse than a kitten scratching your arm? A dead baby scratching your arm...

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzie.

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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Q: What did one car say to another? A: Nothing. Cars can't speak.

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What is another word for a woman that ends in unt. Aunt.

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I had sex. Just kidding.

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What's green , has 4 legs and if it fell out of tree on you , would hurt you ? A Pool table

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A guy walks into a bar. He was an alcoholic and it was destroying his family.

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So a catholic priest, a pedophile, and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a beer.

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How many Neurons does a bug have? - - - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - - - - -- - - - -- - - - - - -It's true

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A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

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Spell: “This word”

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Why did the boat salesman cry? Because a puppet killed his family.

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Why was the teenage girl crying? She wasn't, she was just experimenting with her emotions.

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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