Man: I'm just popping out to get cigarettes (He never returns.)

knock knock how there me ok come in

Knock knock Who's there? A ghost A ghost who?

Welcome to die!

What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

Why is pi? Because circles.

What's brown and sticky? 'Brown' is a colour, and 'sticky' is a consistency. Please try and use correct grammar.

sdasdadasdasd

Q: How do you kill an Asian? A: Deprive of calculator or shoot it.

Yo' momma is like a hardware store, 25 cents for a screw!

peter charastabopouloulous

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

why did the chicken cross the road? There was a depletion of its natrual habitat due to deforistation and it was searching for a new home.

An Irish man walks into a bar. He then sits down and enjoys his favorite drink.

Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

What can't taste with a toung, and it's soul never dies? A shoe

A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

A chickens walks into a bar... And greets her fellow friends

Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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