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How do you have sex with hellen keller? Very sweetly

A tree walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the log face?".

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

what the difference between matthew and a retard? The retard can do math

I need a good anti joke....

How do you get an Irishman out of a bar? You politely ask him to leave.

What happend when 1 second past after 7:00 am? It was still 7:00 am.

Roses are Black. Violets are Green. im going to go cut myself now

Who livs in a pineaple under the sea? Lots of mold and bacteria

What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

Are you a human?

Two drums and a cymbol fall off a cliff... ba bum BUM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA it used to be ba dum ching but im so funny that i changed it to ba dum bum. credit to Alex H

What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

why was the man's arm bleeding? Because he just got shot in the arm...

How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

You know what is really annoying? An annoying baby that wont stop crying while you are trying to do very important work.

Whats white and sticky? Rotten milk.

Q. did u see Stevie wonders new house A. no me. neither did he

68 :)

what did batman say to robin before they got into the batmibile "get in the batmoblie"

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? neither has he

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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