what do you say to someone acting like an idiot? hey, if you keep acting like an idiot im gunna hit you with a freakin bat , you stupid fubu!

What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Shot.

Knock knock! Who's there? Hello. We would like to talk about Jesus with you.

Patrick- hey spongebob i thought of something even funnier then 24 Spongebob- What patrick- 25

What's the same between a plane a bird and a piece of celery? They all fly except the celery

How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

What is green and looks like Grass? A painting of grass

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cos it wanted to.

Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Q. Why did the Muslim go to hell? A. Because his name was Osama Bin laden.

What did the boy have for lunch? A sandwich.

What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

Q: how do you catch a bear? A: you dig a hole, fill the hole with ashes, surround the hole with peas, and when the bear comes to take a pea kick him in the ash hole

what do you call a black man on tv? an actor

What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

today i wanted to write a joke...... a joke

A walrus walks into a bar

milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

If you're doing a maths test, what type of pickles are best when licking a baseball bat? Sasquatch

What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Nothing really

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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