Jackson's dad told him to "play in the traffic".

What should you do when your refrigerator is running? Tell it to FREEZE!

Knoc nock whos dere ronnie turiaf...... Ronnie turiaf who Dennis rodman

On a scale from Casey Anthony to Sandusky, how much do you like children?

What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

roses are red violets are blue i uhh umm hold on... the man with Alzheimers proceeds to think of the rest of his poem he wrote for his date, after an hour he remembers but his date has left and the staff proceed to guide him out and back to the insane asylum

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? It shouldn't take more than one person to do this task, regardless of hair color.

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

Why is god mean? Cause he doesn't like you.

What do you call it when Chuck Norris gambles? Chuck Norris does not gamble. That would imply the chance of losing.

a kid calls 911 and says ,"is this 911?" and the operator says ,"NO! THIS IS PATRICK!!!!!!"

what rhymes with sloth? -RaPe-

Knock, knock. Who's there. Death.

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

I have had depression for several years and have recently been diagnosed with diabetes. I therefore drink diet soda and have sugar free snacks. Which leads to diahrea. Lots of diahrea.

Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

It smells like triangles in here.

There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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