Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

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Think about it: Is mexico REALLY full of: Lowrides in candy ass sparkly colors such as lip red that bounce, (manly color right? Yeah sure baggot) which contains a whole street war gang of members inside and at least twenty tons of COCAINA! ...But does not have a horn that plays "la cucaracha" Seriously, you say yes right? Hey look at this guy he said yes everybody, but ITS WROOOOOOONG CUCARACHA OR GTFO OF MEXICO! Yeah... Because Mexico is shit, id would be racist if Mexicans didn't agree...

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Whats the difference between babies and basketballs? You cant unload a truck of basketballs with a pitchfork.

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what do you watch ? a tv

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. :D

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Shane Murchan is GAY ..... :L

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Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

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guys ive got a TANK under my house a septic tank

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A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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A black guy walks into a dilapidated house and purchases large amounts of narcotics. Racism isn't funny.

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How do you get a dog to obey your rules?¿¿? Threaten to beat it with a rod!¡!

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A women president

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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There was a homeless man living all by his lonesome on a street corner, desperately begging for money. Suddenly, a car comes to a screeching halt and out of the window flies a thin, square piece of plastic. The hobo successfully catches it in both hands. "Whats dis?" he says, "What da hick can I do wid a stinkin wada plastic?" he says, failing to realizing the significance of the thin square of plastic, for he is but a hobo and has been out of touch with reality for quite some time. After some time, he gains back his common sense, "Aha!" he shouts, "it is but a condom!" A few days pass, the man wondering alone in search for a way to make use of his prized, plastic square. He encounters a beautiful female hobo (at least he thinks she is) and they make love. So not only does the hobo make use of the silly condom (which expired-he just doesn't know) he get's laid and keeps warm in the brutal winter weather by getting cozy with the hobo chick. There are some pros in being a hobo, you know. After a month, both hobos make the faithful decision to join their cardboard boxes together, thus creating a new home where they live happily ever after <3

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You know what big feet mean? Big socks

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He had no limbs

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Q: Why did the Mexican jump over the fence? A: He went to go retrieve the ball that was kicked in his neighbor's yard. Afterwords, he continued playing soccer with his friends.

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And Judas approached the rabbis and Pharisees saying, "The one whom I kiss is the one you seek. " To which they responded, "Gay. "

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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whats worse than getting the girl you're talking to taken from you? getting the girl you like taken from you.. by a asian.

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson? I thought you were dead.

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Kelly Clarkson

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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