A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He loved working with tourists.

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If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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Did you hear about the black guy who got into college? Actually, there are nearly 10,00 African Americans who get accepted into college every year. This specific black male is notable because of his stellar grades and his activity in his community.

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How many cows can you fit in a field? It depends on how big your field is.

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what is long, black and looks like a curly-hair? A curly-hair

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A very unskillful basketball team enters a basketball tournament. They had little chance of winning and concluded with a loss.

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with a dinosaur? Beastiality

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Bye, Ax... Nerochan, you just gonna leave me in this state? I mean wont you stop it? I know hypnosis and all but I mean I have like black belt in hypnosis but since you began it, I do not really want to stop it.

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A man sees a clown, a robot, and a monkey walking down the street side by side. The man ponders the randomness of life.

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Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

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What did the Democrat say to the Republican? "I am sorry about your mother". They had been good friends since childhood and the Republicans mother was soon to die from terminal cancer.

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If there are 3 apples, and Johnny takes away 3 of them, how many apples does Johnny have? None, because Johnny got hit by a train.

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Roses are red Violates are blue Go to hell I hate you

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Two men walked into a bar. The third transformed into a duck and flew away.

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What happened when the lawyer pissed all over the judge? He was thrown off the case, causing him to go home, rape his wife, and put a bullet into his child's head.

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What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

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Okay, one second.

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink, drinks his drink, and leaves.

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Knock Knock! Come in!

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A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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