What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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you were my brotha, from another motha, you touch my girl, ill leave you dead in the gutta.

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Why do you always loose your keys at monster truck rally's? Most likely because they fell out during all the excitement of jumping up and down, but the real reason is because they are afraid of monster cars.

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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Reverse psychology never fails.

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Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

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what do you call a middle eastern man on a plane? a passenger.

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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whats yellow sticky and smelly? I dont know i was asking you

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your mom is so stupid, she once wrote a math test and didn't do very well.

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What's the best thing about twenty six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

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How many light bulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic child.? DAMN

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Can Geico save save you 50% on your car insurance? Does a former drill sergent make a terrible therapist?

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When is a Jew the sleepiest? Depends on the time really... some people sleep and wake up on different biological calendars.

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Don't you hate it when ads just [CONGRATULATIONS! YOU HAVE JUST WON A MILLION DOLLARS!* Please click this ad, so you can give us your full name, address, phone number, bank account number, pin number and mail your credit card to us, then you will receive your MILLION DOLLARS!* (you may or may not receive one million dollars) Thank you.] pop up anywhere these days?

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Women's rights

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A woman wearing a very fancy, striped sweater walks into a bar and sits down. The bar tender asks her “what’ll it be”?. The girl replies “Just a beer for me”. As this happens a child in Africa dies from complications due to starvation.

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How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

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What killed the cat? Feline Leukemia

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a homicidal maniac.

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A kraut walks out of a synagogue with no one dead

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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Why couldn't Scruffy get out from under the car? It had parked on his skull.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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