How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

Men, get on the boat.

Your maternal figure contains so many Triglycerides, her belt size is greater than or equal to the circumference of the Earth.

whats the difference between a pair of shoes, and a computer. alot.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he felt like it.

Q: What do you call a white guy cooking a dinner? A: A chef

Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped

A man walked into a pub, and enjoys of a couple off pints. Some time later he loudly asks the gentleman next to him: Do you know about this thing called Fightclub?... The bartender had to call an ambulance, you don't talk about fightclub

obama

What did the Mexican man say to the American man? Nothing. Neither of them spoke the same language.

Yo momma's so fat, her lifespan is probably going to be very short and you will have to bury her soon.

Jim and Dave walk into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll it be?" Dave is black.

Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

Q: What do you call a bunch of blondes standing ear to ear? A: A wind tunnel!

What do you get when you mix a deer and a pickle? A very odd dinner.

How do you kill a cow while your carrying a gun Shoot him

What does this and this have in common , wait I was meant to put pictures up, aww

A black man walks into a bar. It turns out he is a notorious serial killer and he procedes to violently murder everyone in the bar.

knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

What do you call a black man at harvard? Probably a criminal who is in harvard law trying to find a good lawyer.

Whats The Difference Between A Baby And A Watermelon ? You Can Throw One In The Air And Hit It With A Bat , And The Other Ones A Watermelon

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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