What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

How did the blind man eat his soup? With a spoon. Despite no vision, the man could feel the shape of what he was touching.

How do you stop a baby from crying? Throw it off the top of the Empire State Building.

How do you survive the plague? you dont.

What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

Why did your mom cross the road? She Tripped and started rolling

a dyslexic man came on this website thinking it was made by his aunt Tina keoj he was sadly mistaken. it was just a bunch of jokes about dyslexic men going into bars

A Muslim boards a plane with his three sons. Everything goes well, because most on the plane are racially tolerant.

Why did the chicken cross the road? No soap, radio!

Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

There are three types of people in this world: The stupid. And the ones that can't count.

why did the baby bird fall out of the nest? while the mother bird was away a cat knocked over the nest. needless to say the baby bird died.

Why did the mass murderer abandon his killing spree? He found out it was illegal.

What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt

Why did Susie fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock Who's there Not Susie

What did pikachu say when his trainer was murdered? Pikachu.

Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Chuck Norris once went skydiving. his parachute did not deploy. where he landed is now known as the grand canyon

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, every time I drink coffee, my eye hurts". The Doctor then tells him, "You have an infection called conjunctivitis, also known as pinkeye"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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