Heartlight

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roses are red i have a phone nobody texts me forever alonee lol

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Two Penn-State Advisors walk into a butt.

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Al Kida and Terry Wrist walk out of jail.

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What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

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Knock Knock Who's there its me... we need to talk go away tod. i told you never to come back here babe, just open the door why? so you can beat me again? i said i was sorry! i just want to see my little girl... well maybe you should of been there for us! babe... i love you you lying son of a bitch... you dont deserve us open the damn door or i will beat it down im calling the cops YOU BETTER NOT BITCH! I WILL BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOU! tod... please... get out come here no... NO! get the hell off of me!!!! HELP!! RAPE!! RAPE!!! SHUT UP WHORE (crying) please... please... ...mommy? SARAH! GET OUT OF THE HOUSE! MOMMY LOVES YOU! ooh.. theres my little girl. you miss daddy? GET AWAY FROM HER!!! SHUT UP BITCH! come give daddy a hug what have you done to mommy? what you want some too? SARAH I SAID GET OUT THE HOUSE! GET HELP! ...mommy im scared... (sob) oh your crying? you want something to cry about? OH ILL GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO CRY ABOUT! .... you better get the hell out of here tod.. whoah... babe where did you get a gun GET OUT babe... put the gun down... relax NO YOU RELAX! all these years ive been raising this baby. without you. all by myself. and i dont want you in the picture now. ILL DO WHAT I DAMN WELL PLEASE ill see you in hell... (BANG) (BANG)

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yuor momma so fat she has type 2 diabetes

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Why was the white guy eating himself? He was a autocannibal.

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What did the father say to his gay son? "Finish your homework."

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The Braves win the N.L. east

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why did little Tommy sink to the bottom of the pool? He had no arms.

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Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

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this is an anti joke THIS IS NOT A JOKE O:

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What would you do for a klondike bar? I'm allergic to milk.

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What did the Dog say to the Cat? Nothing, Cats and Dogs are of different species and can therefore not understand one another.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead walk into a bar. There is also a woman with black hair standing outside, and the man next to her is bald.

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Why was the girl blind, and deaf? it was hellen keller

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? no eye deer! -jpow

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It was dead.

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Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

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A Mexican and a black guy are in a car. Who's driving? The black guy because the Mexicans was recently aressted for a dwi and had his repealed. But lately he has worked towards cleaning his life up. They were actually driving to an AA meeting.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven ate nine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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