DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

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Why don't women need watches? Because most people carry cell phones that tells them the time making watches redundant and obsolete.

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How old are you? 20

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What's the best way to pick up girls? Lift with your legs, not your back.

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What did the pastor say to the rabbi? Hi (or some other greeting)

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How do you make a Jew cry? You kill all of their friends and family members.

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What do you call a man wearing a costume similar to a stereotypical ghost? A mentally disabled man on halloween.

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Your in a building there's no windows ,doors and a sement floors and u only have a mirror and a table how do you get out You look in the mirror see what u saw take the saw saw the table in half two halfs make a hole clime out the hole

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DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name ten times.rn2.say your mom's name five times.rn3. say your crushes three timesrn4. paste this to four other groups.rnIf you do this, your crush will kiss you on the nearest Friday.rnBut if you read this and do not paste this, then yournwill have very bad luck.rnSEND THIS TO 5 GROUPS IN 143 MINUTES. WHENrnYOU'RE DONE PRESS F6 AND YOUR CRUSH'S NAME WILL APPEAR IN BIG LETTERSrnON THE SCREEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY BECAUSE IT ACTUALLY WORKSrnrnrn

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What's Black white and red all over? Half a penguin

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How does a gay take his pants off? Just like everybody else

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, flotaing in the sea? Someone who will drown very soon.

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THEY SAY SEEING IS BELIEVING. I NEVER SAW 9/11! 9/11? NEVER HAPPENED -Jonathan

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What has one eye but cannot see? A brick with an eye drawn on it

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How do you get a fat man to drop a brownie? Make fun of him until he kills himself, and then drops the brownie.

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Hey I just met you, and this is Crazy, but I think I Love You, so have my baby! ;)

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Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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what's better to a kid than ice cream from an ice cream truck? when you realize the driver was at your house 3 days ago notifying you that he is a convicted pedophile.

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Your mama is so fat... Haha, that's a good joke.

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What do you call a women in the kitchen? A caterer

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dead battery come on down

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"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

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hi corey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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