A Jew walks into a Furness

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an asian walks into a bar and does his math homework then he gets raped by a horse

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What do you call a black man sitting on his porch in the middle of the night playing a guitar? A Musician.

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Three men walk into a bar. Neither of them saw it coming

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A socialist, a Muslim, and an illegal immigrant walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for you Mr.President

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Drunk irish man

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You have been brought down to hell where you are welcomed by satan. "Welcome to hell, where you watch your loved ones get tortured for all eternity" Satan said "Where is everyone? " you ask "Hmmm, I guess you were never really loved"He replied

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

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Why does dan leave Amy? Because dan is in another relationship and did not want to be unlawful to Amy.

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Once upon a time There was an ugly barnacle He was so ugly That everyone died The end!

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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How does a cow does a cow do an evil laugh? Mooooooohahahahaha

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow... She should think about scheduling an appointment at a local dentist's office.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. -sensored-

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? He was on his way home from work and saw some youths loitering on the street corner and thought it best to avoid them and therefore any possible confrontation. He would also appreciate it if you would call him something along the lines of Bravery impaired instead of a chicken as he finds it offensive and doesn't fully understand the avian reference to his lack of confidence.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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Bob:well Joe, its been tough latley, I hats my life Joe: I don't give a tuck, ur retarded, you have never had any friends and I am sure that the school will have a pep fest when u hang ur self in ur bedroom. So go now! I don't know why u even r talking to me and I don't know why I am responding

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What do you call a black man with a job? An employee

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If you were a Transformer, you would be Optimus Fine.

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Knock knock, Who's there? Jason. Jason wh-(death sound when being cut by chainsaw)

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What's worse than not finding your true love in high school? Dying

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How do you starve a blonde? You tie them up and deprive them of any food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops