What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How do you keep a blond in suspense?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why are you reading anti-jokes? ... why are you looking at me like that? I asked you a question, idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's the difference between Hitler and Kim Jong Il? Hitler's German

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The Game.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the over-baring Chinese couple say to there son who got an A- in math? How would I know? I can't speak Chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red Violets are blue I have AD i love squirrels

thumb_up thumb_down +10

,What would you call Morgan Freeman if he was White? Morgan Freeman

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Scientology.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats worse then being raped? Nothing it will ruin your life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

"What do you call a man who has bumblebee wings and fire for blood?" (The doctor on the other line has no answer. Tom desperately weeps into the phone, trying to grasp his sudden transformation. He finds no reassurance, and hangs up the phone.)

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the girl fall off a cliff? Because it was an Anti-Joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

milk,eggs,butter,deodorant,chocolate syrup,chile powder,dildo,bacon

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A disabled man walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops