A man walks into a bar. He has a drink. Then goes back home.

What did the beaver say to the other beaver? Nothing because beavers are wild, indigenous species thus incapable of speech.

A blind guy was reading the newspaper, it said flying cars. I bet he did'nt see that coming!

why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

what did one pedophile say to the other at the playground? DIBZ!!!

Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm in it? Biting into you apple and finding two worms in it.

How did the dead baby cross the road? stapled to the chickens foot.

Obamacare haters

One day a black man, a white man, and an Asian man decide to bet on who has the longest penis. The white man wins by 1/18th of an inch, effectively disproving the stereotype. They all go home a little gayer for the experience.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

your mama so dumb her iq point is below average

There's a pair of siamese twins.....One of them's gay.

What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

What did the the Priest do to the young alter boy? Blessed Him

What's a ghost favourite colour? Ghosts don't exist.

A gay man walks into a bar has a few drinks then goes home without being recognized as a homosexual.

whats worse than your computer crashing? your plane crashing...twice

Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

An eyeball walks into a bar and the bartender asks him what he would like. The bartender promptly wakes up in jail because he was caught having a meth lab in his basement.

I used to play Skyrim but then I took an arrow in the knee. Then, I played MW3 until I took a bullet in the elbow. And now, I'm in the hospital wondering why people keep harming me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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