A dog walks into a bar. the bar tender asks" what'll you have?" the dog does not reply because dogs have not yet developed the type of voice box required to speak or the learning cappacity to be taught the English language.

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what did one tree say to the other? move over

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the appropriate amount of medicine as directed by her doctor for her condition.

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Congratulations, sir. The judge has determined that the charges of traffic violation against you were indeed incorrect, and you will be given a large sum of cash for your wasted time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

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Why couldn't the girl throw the baseball over the fence? She had no arms.

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Yo momma so ugly that she had self esteem issues and committed suicide, making her husband extremely depressed.

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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what did the black guy say to his friend who was on acid? man you trippin.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

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Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

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Q: How do all 5 gay guys walk? A: In One Direction

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how do you fall off a building? you trip.

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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What did the 4 year old black kid ask his father for Christmas? A yo-yo. nah im just kidding he doesnt know who his father is.

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why was the kid sad? his fish died. he had to flush it down the toilet.

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A bar walks into a man... Wait...

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why was the chinese man so good at math it was his favorite subject

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "Only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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Did you know Hellen Keller had a tree house? No Neither did she

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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