Why is an elephant large, grey and wrinkled? Because if it was small, round and smooth it would be an aspirin.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Shmellmype. Shmellmype who? HAHAHAHAHA (read out loud)

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Two boys are playing with a toy submarine. One isists it will work in a real test. The boy drowns and the company is sued.

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What do the holocaust and 9/11 have in common? They were both terrible tragedies that people will look back upon in sadness for years.

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This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

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Penis penis poop butt

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Why can't Hank drive? Hank is a stone.

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How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

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What did the lonely old man get on valentines day? Nothing, because his wife died of cancer two years ago.

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How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

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What's worse than Bieber fever? Yellow fever.

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What did the cricket say to the bear when it entered it's den? Nothing,crickets comunicate by rubbing their back legs together to create vibrations and sound,and it cannot be understood by any other animal besides crickets.

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Q:What did I get for Christmas? A:You, put on this leash.

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a man walked into a store got what he wanted and left.

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a

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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What worse than the holocaust? Dries Roelvink!

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Nothing it is a sentient object and doesn't have the capability to talk

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roses are red, violets? are blue, Im not good at poems, tits

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What do you call an African baby?............................................ A Nigglet.

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Doctor, Doctor, I feel like I don't know anyone... Uh...who are you?

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What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

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What's the difference between Hitler and Kim Jong Il? Hitler's German

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The Game.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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