What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

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hello

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Pen. Pen who? Pen is blue.

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Q: What's the difference between a vampire and a lawyer? A: A lot of things.

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A guy hit his elbow. Judaism.

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Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

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Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs, living in the mountains? A: Cliff Q: What do you call a girl with no arms and no legs, living on the beach? A: Sandy Q: What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on a wall? A: A victim of a serious crime, where murder was committed and the killer has a sick and twisted mind because he first cut off the man's arms and legs then nailed him to the wall with wooden pegs. Puppies.

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When life gives you lemons ....go murder a clown.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because she had a seizure.

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Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

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what's the worst part of your kid dying the clean up

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A black man walks into a bank with a gun......he is a 25-year veteran SWAT team officer attempting to arrest two armed robbers that have 5 old ladies hostage.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A fat man fell on him

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Boo." "I don't know anyone by that name. Please go away." -Louis

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender asks the rabbi "why the long face?" The rabbi says "to get to the other side." Seeing the puzzled look on the bartender's face, the priest says, "orange you glad he didn't say banana?"

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Penisland

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Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

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When life gives you lemons, you realise that life isn't a physical object and therefore you have problems. Have a nice day.

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Knock Knock Who's there I have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock

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a man walks into a bar....... thats it.

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so there are 3 people who have heard of this magical cliff; theyre names are harry, dick, and joe. how the cliff works is that when you jump off you turn into whatever you say as you jump. first harry jumps off and yells plane, he turns into a plane and flys off. next dick jumps off and yells bird he turns into a bird and flys off. finally joe steps up to the cliff as he was walking he trips and falls as hes falling he yells HARRY DICK he than hits the ground and dies. everyone mourned for such a well respected individual.

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I've got a dig bick

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Why did George ride his bike to the park? Due to the down economy his parents were forced to sell his bike in order to pay their bills.

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What's easier to get than a broke prostitute on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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