Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? She's dead.

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A man walks into a bar. ouch.

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Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

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What do you get when you mix your mom and your dad? YOU!!!

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what's worse than finding a fat couple in a buffet?

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What did the cricket say to the bear when it entered it's den? Nothing,crickets comunicate by rubbing their back legs together to create vibrations and sound,and it cannot be understood by any other animal besides crickets.

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Why are the British so uptight? I don't think they are.

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why was the kid sad? his fish died. he had to flush it down the toilet.

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Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

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what do you say to someone acting like an idiot? hey, if you keep acting like an idiot im gunna hit you with a freakin bat , you stupid fubu!

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What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? There are many, no human being is exactly alike.

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So, I was eating out this girl Until I tasted something like horse semen. So I looked up at her and said; " Ah grandma, so that's how you died ! ".

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What do you call a man wearing a costume similar to a stereotypical ghost? A mentally disabled man on halloween.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. So was my son after I beat him to death.

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Q: Your arms are tied and bleeding from your face, a bull is charging at you, a catapult launches a bunch of rottweilers with rabies straight at your face, a nuclear bomb right next to you is five seconds from exploding, and my teleportation device ia right next to you, what do you do? A: You start by getting your own damn teleportation device! The hell ill let you bleed on mine!

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Student: This guy is bothering me! Teacher: And you expect me to do something about it?

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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whats worse than shitting in a urinal??? shitting in a shower

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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A german police officer sees a Rabbi. Nothing happens, it's 2011

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There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

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What's white and flies around ? A seagull. What's black and flies around ? A seagull in the darkness.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? silence... Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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