Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his dying grandma in the hospital

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

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What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

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How do you drown a blonde? You hold her head underwater for a long time.

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roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

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Where do you find a one-legged cat? Right where you left it.

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Whats the square root of x^2? Variables cant be gay

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A sprayed behind is a clean BEHIND!

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Why are black people so good at sports? They practice.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train?!? The teacher is a highly-intelligent organism and the train is a large vehicle used in transporting goods over long distances on the ground.

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What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Why the long face?" Unable to under stand English the horse shits on the floor and leaves

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What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

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How are Polish people and dogs the same? They aren't. One is a human being, and one is a dog. Do not be stupid.

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have you ever tasted ethiopian food? ..... neither have they

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how do you kill a blonde? the way you would kill anyone, here are some examples gun knife noose or orange. wait wtf who kills someone with an orange

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How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

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What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

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How can you tell if a calendar is popular? From stock order lists and also from accounts records.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

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What is Freddie Mercury's favorite planet? Earth.

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whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow Jones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops